What are you apologizing to me for? I'm the one who saw something they shouldn't have. And I didn't live through... whatever that was. You did.
I don't care if it's weird. [ and yeah, it definitely is to him, but maybe it isn't to her? ] I care if you're okay, and you really don't look it right now.
[It's not like she can really cover for any of that.
But she does still, considering him, hand clutching tight to her heart.]
Kazuki...Thank you, first of all. I care about you too, very much.
I'm more just worried that...well. I wouldn't like too many people to know those things. Even if it doesn't mean anything to them, or it has no importance here, I'm still worried because I'm — I'm not really supposed to be here.
[There's a pause.]
Existentially. Not just with the "Oh we hired you, oh no our bosses are too far away to help" thing.
[ he winces. definitely could've used better wording there... ]
I'm not going to force you to talk about it if you don't want to. And I won't tell anyone else.
[ even though he clearly doesn't understand exactly what that means, and his brows furrow in concern. there's probably some kind of magic involved, but that's a little beyond him. he only knows that stuff from movies, and it always changes. ]
...But you know everyone here would be worried, too, right? They'd try to find a way to help you with... whatever's going on.
No, it's okay! You're not forcing me to do anything. And thank you, really, you've been so understanding and so sweet to me, and all I ever do is just have some kind of meltdown that you have to deal with. But you still show up. [She touches his shoulder, soft and appreciative.] And I appreciate that. You're a very kind person, Kazuki.
[Now for the less easy part.]
Do you remember at last week's trial, when Todomatsu looked completely different? And he said he was from uh, an "ani-may?"
Please, I think we're all in the middle of an ongoing breakdown considering all the stuff that's going on in this place.
[ half-joking because this ship is really messed up and somehow still keeps getting worse!! ]
That was just because of the effect last week, wasn't it? But yeah, I remember. It's... a little surreal, but I feel like I'm starting to get used to that kind of thing by now.
I don't think it was just the effect, frankly, I think it was a little bit of what he is, too. [And with a deep breath.] And it's a little like what I am as well.
Kazuki, the reason that I was able to wake up after dying isn't because I have some secret ability or spell, or anything like that. It's because I'm a story.
[She'll pause, watching his eyes closely, but carries on just the same.]
And as many times as my story gets told, I can live. When one ends I start another. I'm not a real person like you or most of the others here.
[ he's silent for a few moments, processing this information. it still doesn't quite click with his knowledge of the world, but... not much around here does. knowing that, it's a little easier to set aside the facts of his own life and try to be more open to others. ]
I don't know if I'd say that. [ he reaches out, touches her arm briefly. ] You feel pretty real to me.
...Maybe I just don't get it. [ kazuki can acknowledge his own shortcomings here; this existential, meta stuff is a little beyond him. but still. ] I don't know. Story or anime or - whatever the rest of you guys are, you're here now. That's plenty for me.
[She looks to the hand at her arm, then into his eyes. The smile has taken a melancholic turn.]
For now, maybe. I don't like not knowing how this works.
[It's an unspoken fear she's been gnawing on for weeks. Getting too close to the Ink, or falling within the Pages could unmake you in The Lines Between. Realizing what she was had been dangerous enough. Dropping her in the midst of mortal reality should have flattened her to nothing, and yet here she stands.
That's to say nothing of the ticking clock the ship has them all on. It's not Thursday yet.]
It's okay, it doesn't make a lot of sense to me either. Especially now that I'm here. But you're right. [She returns the gesture, taking his shoulder and gently rubbing her thumb over it.] No matter what kind of strange things are happening, we have each other, here and now.
[ knowing you're not meant to exist like this and somehow being here anyway? anyone in their right mind would be concerned by that. ]
If they have a way to make this happen at all, then I don't think you have much to worry about for now. Not until the tour is over. [ thursdays aside. but here he pauses, unsure. ] Do you want to go back?
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I don't care if it's weird. [ and yeah, it definitely is to him, but maybe it isn't to her? ] I care if you're okay, and you really don't look it right now.
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[It's not like she can really cover for any of that.
But she does still, considering him, hand clutching tight to her heart.]
Kazuki...Thank you, first of all. I care about you too, very much.
I'm more just worried that...well. I wouldn't like too many people to know those things. Even if it doesn't mean anything to them, or it has no importance here, I'm still worried because I'm — I'm not really supposed to be here.
[There's a pause.]
Existentially. Not just with the "Oh we hired you, oh no our bosses are too far away to help" thing.
no subject
I'm not going to force you to talk about it if you don't want to. And I won't tell anyone else.
[ even though he clearly doesn't understand exactly what that means, and his brows furrow in concern. there's probably some kind of magic involved, but that's a little beyond him. he only knows that stuff from movies, and it always changes. ]
...But you know everyone here would be worried, too, right? They'd try to find a way to help you with... whatever's going on.
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[Now for the less easy part.]
Do you remember at last week's trial, when Todomatsu looked completely different? And he said he was from uh, an "ani-may?"
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[ half-joking because this ship is really messed up and somehow still keeps getting worse!! ]
That was just because of the effect last week, wasn't it? But yeah, I remember. It's... a little surreal, but I feel like I'm starting to get used to that kind of thing by now.
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[will the horrors never cease]
I don't think it was just the effect, frankly, I think it was a little bit of what he is, too. [And with a deep breath.] And it's a little like what I am as well.
Kazuki, the reason that I was able to wake up after dying isn't because I have some secret ability or spell, or anything like that. It's because I'm a story.
[She'll pause, watching his eyes closely, but carries on just the same.]
And as many times as my story gets told, I can live. When one ends I start another. I'm not a real person like you or most of the others here.
I just...popped out of my pages somehow.
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I don't know if I'd say that. [ he reaches out, touches her arm briefly. ] You feel pretty real to me.
...Maybe I just don't get it. [ kazuki can acknowledge his own shortcomings here; this existential, meta stuff is a little beyond him. but still. ] I don't know. Story or anime or - whatever the rest of you guys are, you're here now. That's plenty for me.
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For now, maybe. I don't like not knowing how this works.
[It's an unspoken fear she's been gnawing on for weeks. Getting too close to the Ink, or falling within the Pages could unmake you in The Lines Between. Realizing what she was had been dangerous enough. Dropping her in the midst of mortal reality should have flattened her to nothing, and yet here she stands.
That's to say nothing of the ticking clock the ship has them all on. It's not Thursday yet.]
It's okay, it doesn't make a lot of sense to me either. Especially now that I'm here. But you're right. [She returns the gesture, taking his shoulder and gently rubbing her thumb over it.] No matter what kind of strange things are happening, we have each other, here and now.
That's what matters most.
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[ knowing you're not meant to exist like this and somehow being here anyway? anyone in their right mind would be concerned by that. ]
If they have a way to make this happen at all, then I don't think you have much to worry about for now. Not until the tour is over. [ thursdays aside. but here he pauses, unsure. ] Do you want to go back?