Though it can't be directly after revival either, because Luke... cannot be found! Only for a couple of hours, though, while he's busy working through his trauma. He will not seek her out, but if she wants to track him down, she can find him tucked away in the library with a book, though he isn't reading it and is just kind of staring blankly at nothing, lost in thought.]
For now, he doesn't look over until she calls his name--but at least the sight of her seems to bring him back to the present, and he sits up, smiling slightly.]
[Definitely not okay. Luke is damnably hard to pull anything over, even on a bad day. That he barely notices her walking directly towards him says something.
She takes a seat once the distance is broached, hands clasped tight in her lap. Shoulders a bit more hunched than usual, not proper princess decorum.]
Don't. You didn't ask for any of that. [She bites her lip.] I'm...I'm sorry.
It would've been over soon either way. [He knows what it feels like to die. Even before the Eudora, he'd been close enough to it to know.] You helped. I just wish I'd been able to tell you it was okay.
[Instead of forcing the choice onto everyone else, absolving himself of responsibility for his own fate.]
It's not just that, Luke. Though I'm... [She shuts her lips tight. Waves a hand through the air. Yes, she's horrified, but also it's not about her. It's not fair to make this about her.] It'll be fine. I'm sorry that you got hurt so terribly. That you were taken away.
[No Luke thinks they should make it about her actually
He doesn't say that, but his expression does shutter closed instantly. It's not anywhere near that same coldness from earlier, but there's definitely a wall there. It's shoddier than usual, though--the fact that it's so obvious he's put one up is enough of a sign that he's off his game, when he's normally so smooth about deflecting.
He can't say "nothing," because that would be a stupid lie. So, after a brief pause--]
...I don't think it was too different from some of our past groups. Memories were turned against us.
[This feels wretched. She likes Luke, in spite of his unchecked stubbornness and tight-lipped tendencies. He has a good heart, and he's effortlessly charming. To have him go stone faced in front of her is more unsettling than he knows. She feels like she ought to apologize again. Sorry for intruding, sorry for speaking.
Instead she swallows the apologies down. It helps no one in this moment, least of all him.]
So...were they made into something more ideal? Or more horrifying?
[The observant detective in him notices, even now, how uncomfortable she looks. It makes him want to say something gentler, to dig up his kindness and his caring from the mountain of misery they're buried under, even though it would only be a different form of retreat. She's been so kind to him (and, more importantly, to people he cares about more than himself)--but Luke has never been fair, and to him, that kindness is all the more reason to protect her from painful truths.
But he knows her better than he once did. He doesn't think she'll be satisfied or turned away so easily. So... he considers, deciding how to share just enough to keep them both afloat.]
...They weren't happy experiences, no. [...] We were pitted against each other.
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Week 6, Thursday
Though it can't be directly after revival either, because Luke... cannot be found! Only for a couple of hours, though, while he's busy working through his trauma. He will not seek her out, but if she wants to track him down, she can find him tucked away in the library with a book, though he isn't reading it and is just kind of staring blankly at nothing, lost in thought.]
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no but she tracks him down for certain, pale in the face and puffy-eyed. She's still got some sniffles to evict, especially when she sees him again.]
...Luke?
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For now, he doesn't look over until she calls his name--but at least the sight of her seems to bring him back to the present, and he sits up, smiling slightly.]
Hey, Rosamund. I'm so sorry.
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She takes a seat once the distance is broached, hands clasped tight in her lap. Shoulders a bit more hunched than usual, not proper princess decorum.]
Don't. You didn't ask for any of that. [She bites her lip.] I'm...I'm sorry.
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It would've been over soon either way. [He knows what it feels like to die. Even before the Eudora, he'd been close enough to it to know.] You helped. I just wish I'd been able to tell you it was okay.
[Instead of forcing the choice onto everyone else, absolving himself of responsibility for his own fate.]
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It's not just that, Luke. Though I'm... [She shuts her lips tight. Waves a hand through the air. Yes, she's horrified, but also it's not about her. It's not fair to make this about her.] It'll be fine. I'm sorry that you got hurt so terribly. That you were taken away.
What happened?
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He doesn't say that, but his expression does shutter closed instantly. It's not anywhere near that same coldness from earlier, but there's definitely a wall there. It's shoddier than usual, though--the fact that it's so obvious he's put one up is enough of a sign that he's off his game, when he's normally so smooth about deflecting.
He can't say "nothing," because that would be a stupid lie. So, after a brief pause--]
...I don't think it was too different from some of our past groups. Memories were turned against us.
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[This feels wretched. She likes Luke, in spite of his unchecked stubbornness and tight-lipped tendencies. He has a good heart, and he's effortlessly charming. To have him go stone faced in front of her is more unsettling than he knows. She feels like she ought to apologize again. Sorry for intruding, sorry for speaking.
Instead she swallows the apologies down. It helps no one in this moment, least of all him.]
So...were they made into something more ideal? Or more horrifying?
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But he knows her better than he once did. He doesn't think she'll be satisfied or turned away so easily. So... he considers, deciding how to share just enough to keep them both afloat.]
...They weren't happy experiences, no. [...] We were pitted against each other.