It's about the same for me. But I do know there were people from his last experience that will miss him. Like Kate.
[Gingerly takes up some wall real estate too, folding her hands tidily in front.]
It just...I don't know. It feels wrong, almost, how casual we can be about it. Everyone just expected someone to die, and now someone did, and it's like we're only thinking about how hard we'll have to work tomorrow, and not how hard it must have been for him.
I don't expect hysterics or anything. It just makes me feel sad, is all. Death is still death.
...I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
[ it's true that the situation isn't as desperate or unknown. they know death isn't permanent, and that it is scheduled, and the reasons behind it. but there is still room for individual feeling, he thinks. ]
I'm used to putting everything into trial, because we had to. People told me last time to still think about the victims, too. It's still true now.
Hmm. [She huffs, looking down at her feet.] I suppose so. It's the only place we can put our energy. And it's the only place we get a little bit of justice done, if we're clever about it.
Still. I guess I'm sort of shaming myself, in a way. For feeling bad, but not nearly bad enough. I just didn't get the time to know Essek, so I can't quite feel like I'm...representing him? I guess? I'm sad for him, but not exactly because of him. And I don't like it.
I want very much to find out what happened to him and bring this whole thing to a close, I just know I would hate to die and have everyone just shrug and carry on.
[She pauses.]
Gosh, I'm so rude. Now I'm just laying a bunch of stuff on your shoulders without asking. I'm sorry, Nanase. Please ignore me.
[ haru isn't much of a talker anyway, so this is genuinely fine. he listens patiently, waiting until she apologizes and he's sure she's done to respond. ]
...It's okay.
[ he doesn't mind. ]
You're practically my teammate. [ teammate... in law. ] You can talk as much as you want. [ ... ] You're still sad. It's not a problem that you aren't the most sad.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
w0 ; fri
Are you all okay?
no subject
Me? Oh I'll be all right. Don't you fret. [anna and i will only truly cr when she is an npc] What about yourself?
no subject
We only spoke once. It's not much time to get attached.
no subject
[Gingerly takes up some wall real estate too, folding her hands tidily in front.]
It just...I don't know. It feels wrong, almost, how casual we can be about it. Everyone just expected someone to die, and now someone did, and it's like we're only thinking about how hard we'll have to work tomorrow, and not how hard it must have been for him.
I don't expect hysterics or anything. It just makes me feel sad, is all. Death is still death.
no subject
[ it's true that the situation isn't as desperate or unknown. they know death isn't permanent, and that it is scheduled, and the reasons behind it. but there is still room for individual feeling, he thinks. ]
I'm used to putting everything into trial, because we had to. People told me last time to still think about the victims, too. It's still true now.
no subject
Still. I guess I'm sort of shaming myself, in a way. For feeling bad, but not nearly bad enough. I just didn't get the time to know Essek, so I can't quite feel like I'm...representing him? I guess? I'm sad for him, but not exactly because of him. And I don't like it.
I want very much to find out what happened to him and bring this whole thing to a close, I just know I would hate to die and have everyone just shrug and carry on.
[She pauses.]
Gosh, I'm so rude. Now I'm just laying a bunch of stuff on your shoulders without asking. I'm sorry, Nanase. Please ignore me.
no subject
...It's okay.
[ he doesn't mind. ]
You're practically my teammate. [ teammate... in law. ] You can talk as much as you want. [ ... ] You're still sad. It's not a problem that you aren't the most sad.
I think... he'd appreciate being thought of.